I always keep that very song she used to like close, sometimes, I will sing it, just like she used to do, because, "I do not want to forget about her" I am not trying to say she was the best, there were time's she hurts me, shout at me, and I will not forget that, there were moments she cuddle me, hold my hands, and look at me in the eyes, she was someone who believed in me.
I was told, it might comes up that way, but i choose to ignore, because it was so sweet to me, everytime, so, I was having no time to be thinking of stuff's like that.
She did installed some changes in me, and i will say, she installed those change in the way i look at things in those days, maybe she was older than me, or something, because, I can see that our understanding were not at the same range.
But now we are not together, the learning she used to give has stop at that position she gave, I wonder what will have been, if she were still with me, and the love flourish.
Sometimes, I feels sad at it, and there are also moment, I understand that it was a decision she chose, no one force her to do it, so, I believe this person understand why she have to go that way, and stop it with me, than i do.
Maybe, it is why they said life can be unpredictable sometimes, but it hurts right now that i came across this few letters she once wrote to me.
Reading it right now makes me feels somehow, as if, i am missing someone precious, that should have stay close. And, I am like asking myself, "if i failed to start a fight, "but how was I supposed to do that, when she was very excited to leave".
Maybe it was the way it was to be, and I do not have to feel bad about anything, but one thing is for sure, i will continue to keep a good vibe on my mind, and believed fate to brings us together again, and, nothing will have let me, to let you go, because, even while you are not here, I hardly forget about your kindness, and sometimes even when i did, i still find myself, coming in contact with either something you gave me, or a written note you sent to me.
And, this kind of notes seems magical, like it is consuming my heart, whenever I read those lines on it, I wished I can stop reading them, but i love reading, that is why I can't avoid it, they brings thoughtfulness to me.
But has she, at one day, came across those notes I used to sent to her, in those days? and, if she does, are they giving her that awesome thoughtfulness?
I wish she is happy wherever she is, because, happiness is very necessary in our life, and, if she is not, I am sure that from this very moment, she will, because I am.
Image is mine.
Wes & Grindan