Denying myself what I am capable of - WE206

in Weekend Experiences6 months ago

When I was ten years old, I was so good in football, I used to play it mostly on the weekends, and anyone who saw me playing would enjoyed the way I dribble the ball from angles to angle, jug it with my legs and not forget nodding the ball for a long time till i will get tired and take a rest.

Back then, I was still in primary school, in our ward, schools within that neighborhood used to organize sports games for themselves, our ward is made of six community's, and each of these community has their schools, and in this competition, they would all take part.

My town is the center of the competition and as such, my school played the open match in each of this event. Yet, in those days, whenever a competition was about to kicked off, I would be staying away from school, just because I was afraid of taking part in the competition, I was good in playing football, yes!, within me I know of that, but I was feeling something was like holding me back and always told me sometimes, "I should not go to school within that week of games, so that, I would not join the school team in the competition.

When the first match was played, I wasn't in school and asides from that, my present in the class was needed, but i sent a message to the class teacher through my friend that I would not be in school throughout the week because we were doing farm work in the family.

Deep down inside of me, I knew I was not truthful to my class teacher, but I was afraid of being selected to joined the school team in playing of the match, it happens that, sometimes, I would feel scared of showcasing myself and letting a lot of people watch me, therefore, it makes me to conclude that, I would not perform good, so I believed that, it was better for me not to played the match and disgrace myself.

I was fooled by my own instinct that was it, because, it's never a disgrace to perform poorly in a match, but it helps a football player to learnt of his strength and work up to be a better footballer, I didn't know what to do about it back then, but before, I got myself really messed up, I was rediscovered by Joy, a female classmate, she was passing through our compound and she saw me, her words piece my heart, when she said, "our school had no single good player, because we were beating by another school and if we loose again, that would be all for us, because we will be sent out of the competition.

After she left me, it was just like I was poured water in a full basin, I realized right there that, in football, a team either win or loss match, and if they loss, it is the team that loose, not anybody and when they won, it is still the team that won, therefore, I didn't missed the next competition, I was in school and my class teacher including my classmates were surprised to see me in school that day, because they all thought I was not going to be in school after my letter was red to the whole class.

Fast forward, I joined the team, and before we enter the field, I went close to our class teacher and said to him, "Sir, I am sorry" he didn't want to know why I said it, but he asked all of us to go into the field and make him proud.

I played number 9 and on that game, the first goal came from me and my classmate score another through the help of my assist, we won and after the match, our teacher, asked me, "why do I have to apologize when I did nothing wrong?.

I let him knows that, I was lying about farming work at home, it was because, i was afraid and I thought I would not performed better, If I played the game, he let me know, it is nice that I apologize, because it's not a good thing for a person to lie, so he has forgive me, but he would still help me to conquer the fear incase of next time, I didn't know what he mean, but in the assembly hall, the next day which was on friday, he exposed my reasons for staying away from school to my fellow students, I was ashamed somehow, lastly, I was congratulate for leading the first goal that makes us to qualify in the competition to semi final, and the follow team member's shared in the glory.

This is my entry in the @galenkp weekend-engagement concept, an initiative aim at promoting your style for the weekend and of course, making you had a lovely weekend. greetings.

Images from @repayme4568

Sort:  

When we are afraid, we tend to lie and lose learning things. It was nice one of your classmates saw you and spoke to you and that you went to the other match played by the school and performed well at it. Well done

I became free right from that moment, it moves gradually till the whole nervousness depart from me, and since then, I fear no more.
I wish you a lovely weekend @balikis95

That's lovely.